If there ever could be a bi-polar manifestation in my life,
This week would be it!
As last week came to a close, I had a heart so full of gratitude that I could think of NOTHING to ask for in prayer & fasting. In place of requests, I had nothing but desire to express my heart felt joyful praises.
In less than 24 hours time, that gratitude shifted to an overwhelming feeling of fear, failure and hopelessness! The shift was so sudden that I actually experienced a physical nausea from the emotional roller coaster.
As I have pondered this experience, I have tried desperately to understand, not only what happened (so I can avoid its repeat) BUT how to dig out of the hole I fell in.
In this very real world sometimes things won’t go right-won’t be perfect-and won’t work out on the first try. Keeping a big picture perspective allows us to know that these times WILL pass but they have a place in our lives and we can’t rush the process. It is in these moments of feeling down that we truly learn to appreciate the successes, good times and joys of life.
Last week in my yoga classes, I shared some thoughts that had inspired me. One dear student requested that I blog the mind practice I had shared. As the crazy feelings from this week overcame my heart, I had a difficult time putting the thoughts from class in written form.
After a long chat with my hubby this morning, where I was FINALLY able to put my feelings into words, I had peace restored to my soul. With this freedom came a paradigm shift to my long held beliefs on mindfulness and the power of the present moment.
Prior to the difficulties of this week, I have been adamant that living in the present moment is the key to feeling peace and contentment. I’m a big believer that we need to avoid living in the past and stay away from dwelling in the future- fear, anxiety, doubt, and hate are all manifestations of living outside of the here and now.
This thought process was challenged for me this week. Looking into the past and looking forward to the future, I knew my life was wonderful, peaceful and full of potential, but it was the here and now that felt too big to overcome. With so many emotions and with a VERY heavy heart, the message I shared in class last week had a new meaning to my heart-
You have to take the good with the bad,
Smile when you’re sad,
Love what you’ve got
And remember what you had.
But never forget,
Learn from your mistakes
But never regret,
Things go wrong,
Just remember life goes on.
(Retrieved from http://www.livelifehappy.com)
I realized that no matter how hard we try… things WILL go wrong
AND our strength may give way to our weaknesses
AND we might come head to head with thoughts and feelings that seem to come rushing at us with tsunami force…
In these moments where we are brought to our low, we have two choices-
we can relinquish our power to fear, doubt, and discouragement
we can relinquish to the strength that comes from within, strength that is more divine and bigger than anything we are on our own!
In this strength, we can take ourselves to the comfort of yesterday,
AND the hope and confidence of tomorrow!
We go to yesterday in an effort to forgive and learn, but not forget-
And we think on tomorrow knowing our potential has no limits and we will win ANY battle!
In some way, I add some version of Warrior postures into my practice. Warrior 1 is a good posture to begin a standing series for many reasons.